Love Requires Trust

I am in my early fifties. My husband, Glenn, and I have two wonderful daughters, the two men who love and support them, and five of the best grandchildren God ever placed on earth. We are blessed with a great family whom we love very much.

But our blessings reach past our own family to all involved with HC4A. Nothing compares to the joy I find there. I have been told I am a bragger because I say I am blessed, that I love my job, and that I cheat the system because it is unfair that most people hate going to work while I love it. But I don't see it as bragging, I see it as stating fact. I go to work and witness the permanent changing of lives; Lives of the staff and of the clients, but mostly of myself.

The world of autism has taught me so much over the years. Most of you may already know this but for those of you who don't, let me tell you now - being loved by a person with autism is like no other love. Yes, they love. They love deeply and uniquely. Like a herd of charging elephants, there is no holding back, and nothing half-way about it. They love with all they are. It is the most wonderful, deep, to-your-core love, and words just fall short.
A person with autism needs to have a large degree of trust to let you know them. Often, they behave as if they cannot trust anyone: Unsure and guarded. A person with autism often finds words misleading, hard to understand, and flat-out confusing. At HC4A we combat this confusion by targeting compliance as one of our first goals. What compliance means, simply, is to follow direction. If I say, "come here", I truly expect the child to walk to me. If the child does not, I get up and help them walk to me. This helps them understand that words have value and meaning. Eliminating their confusion from uncertainty by building consistency between verbal and physical behavior helps them gain comfort in the relationship and eliminate fear because they understand that when a person says something, it has meaning. This helps them trust.

In most relationships, trust leads to love. They are also people who want to have others in their life they can trust and love. Don't we all?

And again I'll say, the world of autism has taught me so much over the years - I now eat gluten-free, I enjoy stimming from time to time, but most of all it has taught me to love and be loved on a different level than most people will ever know.